things it's cool to hate

:: gluten ::

Guys, what did gluten ever do to you? Considering most people don't even know what it is, this current gluten-hate is wearing thin. If you don't have celiac disease, then it's actually super unhealthy to cut gluten out of your diet! Also, if you're looking to lose weight, gluten-free ain't the answer. Take it from Women's Health, Harvard, and Jillian Michaels. #StopTheHate

:: gender roles ::

I love women's rights (obvi) and equality for all people and women CEO's as much as the next person. Go Team! BUT what the heck does that have to do with erasing femininity? Like, I want the door held open for me by a handsome gent while I float past in a cloud of enticing par-fume, k? I don't think that's a crime! Sure, people were pigeonholed into gender roles in the past, but these days, there's so much hate that a girl can't do anything that isn't career-related without catching flack! I want to be successful, but I also want to wear dresses and get flowers. Why is this a problem?

:: internet explorer ::

Okay.... they've got a point there. I hear that IE is trying to step up its game, but I haven't been brave enough to venture over to the darkside in the last, ohhhh, decade. So with this one, carry on.

:: math ::

"I just don't have a math brain." "I hated math in school." "Isn't that what calculators are for??" Uggggh. Guysssss. Math is not evil. It's super popular to claim to be bad at and/or hate math, but c'mon. We use math to keep from speeding down the interstate, to figure out how early we need to be at the airport, to calculate the length of time we can go without shaving our legs by the legs-covered-to-legs-bare ratio in our weekly forecast. Repeat after me: Math is our friend ~~not food~~.

:: k ::

Maybe you hate getting a "K" text but you loooooove sending them, don't you? It is the easiest form of passive-aggressive available to us. Ignoring someone may not work. Hinting probably won't either. But thanks to funny* internet memes, dudes now know that "k" means trouble. I genuinely believe that bros send "k" when they actually mean "Okay, sounds good" but heaven help the guy who gets "k" sent back. #ThisIsWar

:: hangovers ::

Am I the only one who appreciates a good hangover? Let me explain. I hate having a hangover, but the hangover itself? It keeps me from consuming all of those extra calories in tequila shots the night before because I don't want to be hungover. It helps me slow down and think about ways to get my life right when I literally can't move my head without vomiting because eff calories, I drank too much tequila. And I feel no guilt or remorse about consuming an entire pizza for breakfast (at 12:30 pm) when hungover. They get a lot of hate, but they definitely have their place.

:: religion ::
Whoa. This is getting deep. But for real. If you take a sec to look into most major religions in the world, their sacred texts are (1) instructions on keeping people healthy and safe back in the day when there was no FDA to warn them of dangers and (2) trying to explain things to people that simply had no explanation at the time. So stop hating on the books. It was the best they could do with what they had. And their philosophies? Many are grounded in love and trying to do right by other people. So you probably don't hate religion. You hate some angry, self-righteous old curmudgeon who offered you anything but love and acceptance under the steeple so stop glaring at people in their Sunday best already. Sheesh.

It's Tuesday. Happy (slightly deep) Snarkfest.